You Are Not Alone

I was walking out of Safeway, putting my bags into the car, and I heard behind me "Excuse me, Ma'am?"

You've all heard it. And you've probably felt annoyed like I sometimes have, because you know what is coming next. But thank You, Jesus, I didn't cringe! I wasn't annoyed! I didn't feel like I was in a huge hurry to get out of there! I turned around.

 "I hate asking, but do you have maybe $3?"

"I really don't have any cash." (My usual and totally honest response because I never do. Have cash.)

And there he stood. And I looked at him. Then I really looked at him.

"What did you need the money for?"
"I was just gonna get some coffee. And maybe a cup of noodles. This is really embarrassing."

Well, that was it for me. I closed my car door and told him, "Come on. Come with me. We'll go inside and get you something to eat."
"Oh wow, Ma'am (I should have told him to stop calling me that!!) thank you so much. I am so embarrassed to be asking."
"No problem. So, how about a sandwich?" I pointed to a deli case full of already made sandwiches. He just grabbed the top one, not even looking at what kind it was. "This is great, thanks so much."
"You're welcome. OK, let's go pay for it and then I'll get you a cup of coffee."

I payed for the sandwich, he stood behind me. I could feel the shame emanating off of his cigarette reeking jacket.

We walked to the Starbuck's stand. I asked what he wanted while the man in front of me ordered. He said just a black coffee would be great. Black coffee it is. "Thank you. Thanks so much."

Then the difficult moment outside the store, when this Mommy/Nonny's heart was aching to hug him.
"So, what's going on? Are you OK?"
"Well, I got kicked out of my place...again. And I've been trying to get into this manufacturing job. But right now I'm sleeping outside. It's...embarrassing." I said "Hey, we've all been there...needing help." He started to cry. I walked over to the side a little so people wouldn't see his tears. After all, he had enough shame to last a lifetime.

What can I do? It wouldn't be wise to bring him home since hubby's working today. Lord?? Ask him his name. "What's your name?" "Dwayne." "Well, I can tell you that I have had family members who were in your predicament, homeless and hopeless. And they are both doing great now."

And I looked into those eyes, pooled with tears, and I said "And I can tell you, you are not alone. You. are. not. alone. I will pray for you just like I prayed for my family members. Don't lose hope. You will come out of this."

Oh man, I just wanna hug him but I resist.
"Thank you, Ma'am. And thanks for this" as he holds up his sandwich and cup.
I squeeze his arm with all the love that would have been in that hug, and tell him "You are welcome."